Categories
Belleville Ontario Quinte West

How having a paper route, taught me the opposite of discipline?

How having a paper route, taught me the opposite of discipline..png

Ashton Deroy writes: “Some jobs are not worth doing.” My brother used to explain to me when we were kids & even teenagers. We would frequently be in the cold busting our butts to collect $20-$30 bi weekly for a paper route. Something we distributed through the Trentonian publisher. They circulated their main paper & a Community Press paper in Trenton Ontario back then. “You see Ashton, if we worked at McDonald’s we would get an hourly wage. Or we could just be at home sitting on the couch & watching TV.” This is when I learned in Trenton Ontario that some jobs are just not worth doing… 

I would continue to have paper routes & a little bit of income. Nothing really that worth wild. My brother on the other hand went to High School, had friends & knew how to ignore our parents when he needed to. Actually on that note it was our parents always pressuring me to take Paper routes. I would regrettably apply and take the jobs to my detriment. Kyle would be inside comfortable & basking in his intelligence on this issue.  “Some jobs are not worth doing.” This logic can be applied to… 

  • Call center jobs – Which pay bare minimum, grant employees no schedule control & makes you a disposable human resource. Shout out to S&P Data & Hinduja Global Solutions. Thanks for making family life worse in Quinte West & Belleville Ontario. You spoiled brats and selfish capitalists! 
  • Tim Horton’s jobs – I simply can’t imagine working for an employer who openly advocates for less labor rights. They have some mighty brass balls! I think one day this will contribute to their employees turning against the company. They are just a terrible company with no values & a profits only business model. 
  •  Paper routes – It should be a struggle to find paper boy workers. It is a pain in the butt to walk around in the winter & deliver papers. Just to walk around with $20 or $30 extra bucks. Kids have every right to refuse this boarder line slave labor. 

When I delivered papers as a kid & teenager here is what I learned? Some jobs serve the sole purpose of making people sick & permanently disabled long term. Many times when working the paper route I would get sick & wonder why I thought it was worth it. The truth is it wasn’t worth it. I hated coughing my guts out despite the fact back then I wasn’t a smoker.

Only joyless people need to fill every spare moment in their life with work & school. Forget what you see preached on your favorite Neo-Liberal & Conservative forms. If you need to fill all of your spare time with work & school. You are not capable of your own self-fulfillment. Back in High School when I had a paper route? I should of been focused on what I wanted to do. What did I want to do? I wanted to be on the Wrestling team, I wanted to workout at the gym with people my age & I wanted to study! Why did I need a paper route at all? The best I can come up with truthfully is there were times where my home was a rather joyless place. I think most paper delivery people are from joyless homes. This holiday season make sure you tip these poor teenagers.

What my “lazy” brother is doing now? Back when I took a paper route like a chump & my brother was sitting at home preaching to me about how some jobs are not worth doing. He was still working on things that matter. He is a nurse now, he makes bank & can afford his apartment. Me the person who worked their butt off from a teenager outward is verging homelessness. People do burn out & we need to stop acting like it is this imaginary thing. 

Not a lot of jobs in Belleville Ontario & Quinte West are worth doing. Despite what Meta Employment says in regards to their struggles with employees no showing interviews. We have to realize the quality of jobs are low in this area, no one is in the mood to shut up and just do it anymore! Every job needs to develop an attitude & benefits beyond a pay check. Otherwise the preparation needs to begin for a largely disengaged society. 

Categories
Mental health

Talking about a family narcissist. Ashton Deroy

Codependency

Ashton Deroy Writes: Have you ever met someone so pig headed, they would let you criticize our public banking system before they let you criticize them for having, for example $8,000 in debt? That would be the case for me in dealing with one of my family’s narcissists. What is a narcissist?  

Narcissist

Some people think I qualify as a narcissist because I write blogs. However I don’t think the world runs around me & as I will point out to anyone who spends enough time with me, I hate myself. However I am talking about someone who is so truly delusional in narcissistic  behaviors, I could at times buy in to what they said. Although that has faded over time. Now I am mesmerized by the display of constantly unhealthy behavior, while keeping a healthy distance and doing some healthy introspection on top of it. 

Ever met a couple where one of the people in the couple has a sole purpose of making sure the other doesn’t crash the car well drunk? This reminds me of this narcissist’s girlfriend or sometimes the “enabler”.  The thin line of co-existence & codependency is met by the fact he has interfered with her ability to keep a job, take care of her daughter & function. Meanwhile when she had a job and he didn’t he have no problem asking her for the money for weed. I repeat, “enabler”. I said, I use them to introspect and this is partially why I don’t want my boyfriend to buy me weed. 

How to distance yourself from the narcissist? 

  • Lie– When they call? Say you have stuff to do.
  • Tell Harsh truths- Just as effective as lying because when the narcissist has taken too big a blow on their ego they will back off. (If they are not violent)
  •  Don’t let them control the schedule– They always want to suck you back in to their world. Always state why you are busy or indifferent to their plans. 

I use all of these tips to deal with the family narcissist because getting sucked in is not an option. 

Three things we can’t really say to this family narcissist: 

  • You need a job – You are behind on your bills and can’t afford food half the time. Again you have $8,000 in debt. 
  • Go get medical help – You have serious mental health and addictions issues. Yet you do not address them 
  • Treat your mother & sister with respect – How is it you have slut shamed one & called the other a whore?

Anyways I saw this narcissist last night in Stirling Ontario & as of now at Loyalist College. I am glad it is over. 

 

Check out the Narcissist’s Dilemma written by Leon F Seltzer Ph.D. Published October 12th 2011. 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evolution-the-self/201110/the-narcissists-dilemma-they-can-dish-it-out